“Under no circumstances are you to discuss what happened here today,” my mother said. “This stays between us, understand?” The assembled wedding party nodded solemnly. Aunt Gracie picked another shard of a shattered champagne flute from my mom’s scalp. My mom winced in pain. “Careful, Gracie!” she hissed. “Christ.”

My sister, Kaitlyn, snapped the rest of her already-broken heel from her right shoe. Her left shoe was missing. The back of her wedding dress was streaked with grass stains. “Are the police gone?”

Aunt Simone peeked through the heavy velvet curtains. “Not yet.”

Outside, a man in a torn tuxedo was being escorted into a police car in handcuffs. Another three men, also in tuxedos in various states of disrepair, were sitting on the curb, their wrists bound with zip ties. A tow truck was hauling a wrecked limousine with a “JUST MARRIED” sign from a ditch next to the church parking lot.

“I can’t believe he didn’t just rent a limousine,” Aunt Gracie said. She cut a square of gauze and taped it over the gash in my mother’s scalp. “Who did it belong to?”

“His Uncle Robbie,” Kaitlyn replied.

The guests exchanged knowing glances. My brother Harold whistled The Godfather theme song until my mother cut him off with a sharp glare.

“Roberto Antonucci?” Aunt Simone asked. “Well, that explains a lot.” She drained the rest of her scotch. “No wonder they came in swinging like that.”

Harold pulled a bloody wad of toilet paper from his nose. He dropped it in a trash can. “That’s what happens when you steal—”

“Borrow!” Kaitlyn snapped.

“—borrow someone’s limousine without asking.”

“Enough!” my mother announced in a stern voice. “We’re not going to let what happened today ruin a perfectly good wedding.”

“The ceremony was beautiful,” Aunt Gracie acknowledged. The other guests nodded in agreement. Aunt Gracie bent down and tweaked my cheek. “What did you think about it, little lady?”

I shrugged shyly. “I punched a man in the nuts.”

The room erupted in laughter. Kaitlyn gave me a high five.

“Best flower girl ever.”

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